This month marks Julian's third year angelversary and I am so happy to announce that I was able to donate fifteen journals to three little birds perinatal in honor of our baby born sleeping. We also had the chance to visit Sedona and spend much needed time out in the wilderness. This angelversary I found myself thinking a lot about the the last journal prompt I created, hence the title of this post.
(P.S.. If you would like a donation for 2019, please message me)
I've never really written about my personal religious beliefs surrounding our sweet Julian. Those of you who have downloaded or purchased my Baby Loss Journal may have noticed that it is not a religious juornal. Even the last line is intetionally left open-ended to some reality where an afterlife may or may not exist. I have actually had religious types ask me to remove that line or make it more explicit about the existence of an afterlife. If any of you follow my blog at all, you will know that I certainly am religious. But I also believe that life after death is not at all guaranteed in any way. This is my biblical perspective at least.
I also know how mothers struggle with the belief in an afterlife and feel alienated from their religious beliefs after the loss of their baby. Other mothers feel alienated from the 'fairytale' perception of life after death where our babies magically grow wings and fly around in the nether space watching us from above. Or the common picture of our babies being held by Jesus in heavenly bliss whilst watching us cry our brains out here on earth. I am by no means an atheist, but I deifinitely relate to these mothers. I also think their inclings are correct. It would be cruel for our babies to watch from afar all the pain and suffering their grieving family has to endure without them. At lease it seems cruel to me.
Not In Heaven?
It is my biblical perpective that people are not automatically transported to heaven or hell after death (unless specifically noted in the word). For not even king David ascended to heaven but is dead and buried according to Peter in Acts 2:25-35
Is Everyone Saved?
It is also not my biblical perpective that any person who merely believes in Christ will be saved. For the bible tells us that even the demons believe but of course they will all be destroyed.
You believe that God is one. Good. Even the demons believe—and shudder! Do you want to be shown, you foolish person, that faith apart from works is useless? -James the Brother of Jesus
The word also teaches that the journey toward eternal salvation is arduous and many will fall short.
Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness -Jesus Sermon on the Mount
Therefore, I will not change the last line in my baby loss journal. It is written intentionally ambigious and it is my hope that it will inspire mothers to search for answers and seek the Lord with all their hearts. Because he has promised,
You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart
Lastly, I by all means believe that innocent babies who have passed away will be saved. King David's baby dies
The question is not will our babies, one day at the last judgment, be given resurrected bodies. The question is will we be there to mother them in eternity?